Tinder Stories: 3 LGs Talk Cute Dates, Green Flags & Finding A Match
Created in partnership with TINDER
Jas, 25, London
I met my boyfriend on Tinder a couple of years ago. Before we met, I went on five dates with different guys, a couple of which made it to the third or fourth date before we decided to go our separate ways. My overall experience was really positive and I’m glad I was able to meet some nice people, even if they weren’t the right fit for me. At the start, I struggled to find someone I really clicked with, but I’m glad I persevered and went on more dates with an open mind.
I always felt nervous on first dates. But the more I went on, the more confident I became. After a couple of weeks chatting on the app, I met my now-boyfriend at King’s Cross Station. I remember trying to spot him in the rush hour crowd and feeling nervous, but after we said an initial ‘hello’, I felt instantly at ease. The conversation was even better in real life, and everything felt exciting from that point onwards.
Tinder is a great tool for building confidence. I used the app on and off at university in between break-ups as it helped me put myself out there. Sometimes, even if I didn’t end up going on dates, I felt better knowing there were people out there and I could opt in and out when I wanted to.
Staying safe on dating apps was important to me. I lived with my brother when I was dating and always shared my location with him before the date, as well as details of our plan. I would also tell my mum or a friend to make sure at least two people were aware of where I was going. Plus, Tinder introduced its verification feature, so I could spot my date quickly in real life.
Online dating is about not setting sky-high expectations. When I was single, I often felt a connection online but experienced a different vibe in real life, which was sometimes disappointing. However, I liked that I always had the opportunity to meet people as that can be difficult in London. My advice to others would be to keep the first date as chilled as possible – go for drinks or pick a light-hearted activity. More intense dates can put unnecessary pressure on both people.
Alex, 19, Manchester
I downloaded Tinder last year after going to university. I’m from a small town in Scotland so never had the opportunity to date that many people at home. I’m definitely an introvert and haven’t had much experience with dating, so I was really nervous to create an account. There aren’t many people my own age back home, so I changed my location to Manchester before I moved there and spoke to a few people about meeting up for coffee.
After freshers week, I went on my first proper date. We went on a walk around campus, then grabbed a drink at a local pub. The date went well and lasted five hours – we had lots in common and my date was a great listener. I also really fancied her, and we gave each other loads of compliments. We ended up getting a late-night Chinese takeaway and singing our favourite songs at a local karaoke bar.
On our third date, she told me she didn’t see things going any further. I was really upset as I really liked her but I was glad she was honest and let me down gently. A few months later, we bumped into each other on campus and decided to grab a coffee together for a quick catch up. Now, nearly a year later, she’s one of my best friends and I can’t imagine university life without her. Even though we didn’t have a romantic connection, I’m so glad I met her – and now she gives me advice on other matches!
I’m back on Tinder and enjoying casually dating. I’m not sure if I want a relationship right now, but I am open to meeting new people through the app and seeing what happens. Plus, my university accommodation is quite far from the city centre, so it’s a great way to meet people I wouldn’t normally socialise with.
My tip for other young people on dating apps is to look for green flags. I’m still selective with who I match with, but I like to look out for good signs, not just red flags. I’d like to date someone who has similar interests to me (music and running), but I’m open as to who that person might be. If they are kind and have a good sense of humour, I’ll be happy!
Tam, 22, Brighton
I’ve just come out of a long-term relationship and I’m finally ready to date. I don’t want a relationship right now, but I would love to be taken on fun dates and to meet new people. I work night shifts in a care home, so I never have the time to meet people at bars or clubs like my friends. That can make it hard to put myself out there and socialise on the weekends – when I’m catching up on sleep or want time to myself.
There are lots of cute guys on Tinder, but I’m really bad at making the first move. I usually wait for matches to appear, but I’m trying to get out of my comfort zone and be open to chatting to new people. I often get put off and get ‘the ick’ really easily. I once went on a date with someone who arrived on an electric scooter and that was enough to put me off. I didn’t really give him a chance, so the date didn’t last very long. Now, I’m trying to be less judgemental and fussy.
I’ve enlisted help from my friends to try Tinder’s new MatchMaker feature. That way, they can suggest potential matches for me. I’m excited to see who they recommend and love the idea of being set up on a date by one of my besties. They know me well and are aware of my interests, hobbies (and turn-offs) so I trust them to recommend some cool people.
I have to get to know someone before I fancy them. I never give guys my Instagram and instead chat on the app to make sure they seem like a decent person who is genuinely interested. My ideal date would involve a walk along the beach or a trip to Brighton Pier for games and arcade snacks, then drinks at a local bar. Fish and chips afterwards would be a bonus!
Don’t be afraid to take a break from dating. That’s my top piece of advice for anyone using the app. It can be demoralising to match with the wrong guy or not find your ‘perfect’ person straight away. But, in my experience, dating should be fun, light-hearted, and make you feel good. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself, and don’t be afraid to take a break when you need it. Feeling good about yourself is far more important.
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