8 Life Lessons From An Inspirational Woman

During my very first lot of chemo, I most definitely was not on top form. But I realised that, while I was having the treatment, that period could be a significant part of my remaining life and therefore I had to live each day as if it were my last – I had to say ‘yes’ to everything (within reason) and make the most of everything, even the most mundane. Izo and my husband Rich were my biggest priority (and still are), so I had to do everything I was told to do, keep myself as well and as active as possible, turn up for the numerous appointments for blood tests, chemo etc, and keep as positive yet realistic as I could. Of course, my family had no control over any of it and the whole experience was harder for Rich and Izo and for the rest of my extended family.

Once I’d finished my initial chemo and the disease was under control on the monochlonal antibody therapy, I was incredibly grateful to be alive. I felt so lucky the treatment was working, had stabilised the disease and I was able to continue being a mother to little Izo and a wife to Rich. I returned to work as a sister in critical care at NGH six weeks after my chemo and, by early 2014, I felt ready to take on a new challenge and help others with cancer. How do you turn something so devastating into something positive? You use it to your advantage. It’s the old SWOT [Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats] analysis – turn your weakness into a strength, turn the threat into an opportunity.

In my 20s, I left my nursing career temporarily and went to read French at university – this led to me working as an events manager for a children’s charity for about four years before I went back to nursing. There, I organised fund raising events which gave me some crucial skills, many of which crossed over into my work as a nurse. I knew that organising a big party was something I could do and that I was in a unique position to be able to persuade, encourage and enthuse others to join me in putting on an event to raise funds for the chemo suite at Northampton General which had a £500k fundraising target for a new chemotherapy centre. I aired my plans with as many friends as I could and asked if they were interested in joining an organising committee – they were all keen to help in some way. I had worn different coloured wigs when my hair fell out to make the whole hair loss thing less difficult for Izo and her friends, and also as a conversation opener for those who found the cancer talk difficult. This became the theme for our event, and that is how the Big Wig Ball was born. 

To date, we have run three over the last eight years – fun-filled, quirky parties that celebrate the work done to help and treat people with cancer, while at the same time raising money for various charities. We started with the ‘Big Wig Ball’, followed by ‘Big Wig Goes Bollywood’ and, last summer, we held our third event ‘Big Wig – from Burlesque to Bugsy Malone’. Each event hosted 500 guests and we have raised a grand total of £256,000. However, the fundraising is just a small part of Big Wig’s success – it has brought together in excess of 1,500 people in pursuit of a common goal and this is all due to the Big Wig committee – 13 incredible women who I’m so proud to call my friends.